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Love is harder than IRON and STEEL
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| Love is harder than IRON and STEEL |
| 07.04.04 (3:30 am) [edit] |
why is it hard to love somebody?
.. i didnt know. but to be frank, i'm a girl who has
everything under my feet but still, i feel much 'empty' inside me. Despite that i'm seeing someone special at the moment, the feeling just don't feel right?
i start having doubts whether he's the ONE for me or
maybe he's just another casanova..
all my life, i've never fall in-love so deeply with someone
but when it did occured, why on earth it's so miserable,
feeling of mixture, frustrated and BLUE sometime.
I guess he has caused some mental illness to me..
instead of making me better, he keeps making me ill and sick.. I'm so depressed..
Right at the point of my life, i'd could understand
the feeling, whereby i've treated some of my friend quite badly and gave a cold shoulder. The feeling of guilt thicken and i feel so sorry for those mean words, i've uttered intentionally. I hope somehow i was forgiven!
but, one thing i need to be clear here. That my relationship with my boyfriend is jeopardizing..
I guess i could no longer love this chap because,
he simply just meant for himself NEVER me.............
Yes! i do love him but i love myself even more to being hurt and tortured in such way. Every now and then, i feel so inferior about myself. I started to have doubts on my importance to him. Whether he do love me, as much as i love him.. I don't know!! Somehow, i shall ditch off this relationship for heaven sake. Many of my close buddies already gave me words of warning.. because they feel things progress abnormally .. :(..
At this moment, i know i can't lose him but somehow,
i know i will walk off from his life sooner or later.....
At least, i know i've tried my best to save my relationship
but to no avail. The last resort will only mean to GIVE UP.. When it's over, that's the time i shall fall in love again..
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